crows: (red)
squeem [10:13 PM]
you didn’t know about the serial killer ?

I mean, it’s me
crows: (face)
tseiffer: I've never been allowed to go all out against a swan.
crows: (Default)
L: It's apparently just some fruit, okay!
crows: (red)
now you have 1.5 lesbians following your serial!
Today lesbians
Tomorrow gbt

ETA: My friend is writing a web serial, partly due to my years of browbeating:
crows: (Default)
vayleen [8:00 PM]
You can't yolo through ever meal, Marie, that's how Socrates got poisoned

crows: (caw)
4c whole milk
5 (heaping) tbsp dutch process cocoa
5 (level) tbsp brown sugar
1 tsp vanilla extract
hearty pinch of salt

Heat milk in saucepan (gently) over medium heat. Measure dry ingredients into measuring cup, add a small quantity of milk and mix to dissolve. Pour into saucepan and whisk periodically. Top with whipped cream.
crows: (Default)
Everything on craigslist looks like a scam. Everything on monster or careerbuilder is either for very skilled labor (no, I don't know how to repair specific, or any, medical equipment, nor do I have a CDL), part time and/or temporary, or KMart and Target.

I'm never going to get out. I made the mistake of thinking there actually was a door open to me when in fact I had missed that opportunity months ago because of trying to do the right thing by someone who probably at the end of the day didn't notice and didn't give a shit and likely has a bad opinion of me now either way. Because I don't have anything of value to offer anyone, and the things I can give aren't the things that people want me around for. Everything else is out of order and I don't know how to fix it. People still think I'm early twenties because it's so obvious I'm completely floundering and the idea that I might actually be an adult age is laughable.

There is nothing I am doing right now that doesn't come down to inertia and numb muscle memory. So fucking pointless.
crows: (Default)
Sometimes I don't want to go to bed because I want to put off tomorrow coming. Not because I think it will be worse, but because I know it's not going to be any better.
crows: (face)
"Oh, hello friend. Nice to see you." to the spider in the window.
"You don't need the jelly! Kitties don't like jelly!" to the cat.
"Are you raining suddenly?" to the outdoors.

One day I will get wiretapped and thrown in the loony bin, for all the things I talk to that aren't talking back. Especially early in the morning.
crows: (caw)
That moment when you have given yourself a lot of writing homework and you haven't totally bombed out on it but you're not as far as you should be so you spend a lot of time reading about binomial nomenclature so you can give an accurate-sounding name to a fictional species of incidental bird which will probably not appear outside of this scene that you're not writing.
crows: (red)
22:12 Squeem
we will do it better than Dr. Chuck Tingle
22:12 Squeem
and play it straight
22:12 Squeem
by which I mean gay
22:13 Squeem
no, I think bisexual
22:13 Squeem
Bisexual is clearly the way to go
crows: (caw)

On eggs...

Jan. 24th, 2015 09:47 pm
crows: (Default)

On meaning:

Nov. 2nd, 2014 06:46 pm
crows: (Default)
18:40 Squeem: ffffffuuu
18:40 Squeem: My eyes are sparkling with potential, that's what that meant
crows: (mist)
Eavesdropping on a hilarious conversation between two dudes talking about films.

"I saw Gladiator last night for the first time. See, I'd thought that it was commonly considered like... a bad movie, like 300, and I was watching it and being like... you know, this is actually kinda good, I'm just gonna throw that out there. I think I like it. Then I found out it won a bunch of Oscars."

Also, talking about Edge of Tomorrow. "It... it was good, man." (Said in an 'I'm just gonna lay this on you' voice.)

"No way. Doesn't it have Tom Cruise in it?"

"Yeah. That's the one."

"Is he like... a supporting character?"

"He's the lead."

crows: (caw)
I now have... a flickr account.

That is all. I am trying to learn how to use my real camera to take real pichers.
crows: (black raven)
Sea dreams last night, no flood. Sharks. Watching a hammerhead give birth under crowds of people partying in and on the water. No one hurt, though I pulled Thief up from the surf when it looked like the shark might have been charging. It's the shore I always dream of, unreasonably steep beach and instantly deep water. There was a haunted house, too, later. The kind of place you're alone in, but you're never sure if you're alone.
crows: (Default)
Disconcerting dream about the Black House last night. I mean, they all are, really. The Black House is somewhat terrifying and increasingly feels like home. Real Home.

Anyway. This time, it was a huge sprawling castle. There was some kind of amorphous threat beyond the walls per usual and plenty of danger inside the building. I was hunting down archetypes of some kind, character in dichotomies (courtesan and priestess, I remember, though there were others). I sought them out, hidden away in secret chambers in the castle where they had sometimes been for ages I think, and had to get advice or secrets about the castle, but I don't remember the specific information. There was also the ghost of a soldier who was sometimes a friend and sometimes an enemy. I think that's reflective of head hopping throughout the dream rather than changes in his character.

The world beyond the castle was apocalyptic. This might be another common theme in the Black House dreams but I so rarely feel allowed to leave the grounds of the House that I don't often see it directly. But maybe that's why the outside world is so threatening.

At the end I was back in the castle, laying clothed in bed with another person, listening to an insistent knocking at the door and hoping desperately that one of the other entities in the castle would answer it and make them go. That if we managed to pretend we were sleeping we'd be safe. I told myself that there was nothing to be anxious about, just someone knocking at the door. But I couldn't make myself believe.

I wake up to phantom knocking a lot.


Jan. 17th, 2014 09:01 am
crows: (Default)
Seems fitting that I should wake up feeling pretty sick only a day after discussing with my coworkers how they might be making pseudoephedrine prescription only to cut down on people cooking meth out of it. I've never cooked meth out of anything in my life, but I do get sick occasionally, and when it hits hard, 'real' Sudafed is a major stepping stone to being able to still do stuff like... go to my job(s). I can't really afford to take time off for being sick most of the time, and the gorgeous thing about that is that I definitely can't afford the office visit to have a prescription for basic, effective cold medicine written for me.

I mean, maybe life under Affordable Care will be different, but I'm not real hopeful. I'm close enough to the poverty line in my state that I'm going to be put on Medicaid, and while I am looking forward to some coverage of my IUD replacement next year (which will be a huge help; the upfront cost of those is pretty steep), I'm not suspecting that I'll have the luxury of being able to go to the clinic when I'm sick or have regular checkups. The safety net of there being something to fall on if something really bad happens (without the deductible being more than half my yearly income, which is the state of the insurance I've 'had' so far) is great, and I think it's a tremendous step toward making this broken-ass health care system work in this country (basically, I'm not bitching about Obamacare, here), but I'm not expecting to just suddenly have the same access to medical oversight that a person who has had decent insurance throughout much of their lives does. And yeah :( this morning is a good reminder of how much I hope they don't make it more difficult for me to keep myself going when the eventual flu hits.

tl;dr whine whine whine I feel shitty
crows: (Default)
Reprising this recipe for chocolate chip cookies tonight. At some point my sister told me to use two eggs instead of one, the result of which is slightly lighter, definitely softer and chewier cookies and since I like chewy cookies I do this now.

No particular occasion. K said he wanted cookies and autumn is a good time for baking. My boss at the store is stressed because we, well, bought a house and now we have to move the store into it, so I'm going to bring some in for us at work tomorrow as well. It's a double batch, though I'm probably not going to bake all the batter up tonight.

And that's all, folks.


crows: (Default)

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