Back at the beginning.

[crows]

The monster is so close. Close enough that all day, post the very early anxiety-attack morning, I've wondered off and on whether it might be worth trying to get in with a therapist.

Ha, ha.

With what money? With what trust?

I feel awful. When my head was racing last night I thought I had a lot of things to say about it, that maybe writing them would help. Maybe writing anything would help (isn't that a thing we used to do?) but all my thoughts are falling apart like wet paper.

Comments

[squeemu]

:< I'm sorry to hear that.

And I have so many friends who consider themselves at least part-monster that I have to ask: is this a monster you need protection from, or one from whom others need protecting? (Also, I'm... not entirely sure that sentence made grammatical sense, but I've had less sleep than usual.)

[crows]

The monster to which I am referring to here directly is depression, plain and simple. It's whatever is wrong with my brain, that's making me live so close to the border of my coping skills right now without reprieve.

[squeemu]

:< :< Then I'm extra sorry to hear that. I mean, I was kind of guessing from the tag and the context, but wanted to make sure.

Let me know if there's anything I can do while I'm visiting to help.