(no subject)

I am so afraid right now. A silent pressure, and anger, hangs onto my shoulders like suit of black armour, sheilding my eyes and my heart from the brilliance of the world. I distrust my country, our 'leader'. I distrust what they might do to me, and I believe I am innocent of it... for I don't want this. I want to rise above and go, leave this empty hole alone and crying for what it has done to itself. I want to go back home, to the red streets and white, white walls. That place cannot exist for me here. This is too real, too hard, and I feel to awkward being a piece of another puzzle. I've read these same words, this repeating history, ten thousand times but always at a distance... and I don't understand how it can be happening in my generation as I grind my head over apartments, occupations, diners, sex; the entirety of my blossoming life, shuddering in the shadow of something I want no part in.