authoring destruction

4c whole milk
5 (heaping) tbsp dutch process cocoa
5 (level) tbsp brown sugar
1 tsp vanilla extract
hearty pinch of salt

Heat milk in saucepan (gently) over medium heat. Measure dry ingredients into measuring cup, add a small quantity of milk and mix to dissolve. Pour into saucepan and whisk periodically. Top with whipped cream.

Major Issue #1 of 2009:

The motor in the furnace in my family's house failed during some of the coldest weather we've seen in many years. When I left this morning, the indoor temperature was 37; outside it was -13, a more than ten degree drop from where it hovered around zero yesterday. The forecast suggests it might be down to -30 tonight. Fortunately, they did find a new motor for our 30 odd year old furnace and were able to install it today so we have heat. The motor (replaced a few years ago) burned out so quickly because there is a deeper problem in the furnace (which we knew was probably toward the end of its days as it is...) so it will need to be overhauled next year. In summer.

We don't think any pipes burst. There was ice somewhere in the plumbing leading up to the bathtub that I use (it didn't drain this morning) but that's happened before without dire consequences.

Anyway. Feels a little like a narrow miss, that does.

Less pressingly, I finally went to download Wrath of the Lich King last night... upgraded my account and all. I was surprised that the installer only prompted me for a 30 minute wait but I went to bed anyway because it was late and I knew I wasn't going to sleep well. Turns out that the installer was just downloading another installer which has yet to download the client :\ so, I have to do THAT tonight since it's like a gig or more and the rents' internet is slow. AND there's a 15 minute queue for Lightbringer! What gives! I've been counting toys for three days, my brain is mush, and I want to play WoW mindlessly.

I guess this is a good sign that I should maybe go play some guitar.

Happy trails, y'all.

Ooh... maybe I should bake. I haven't had an opportunity to use my new cookie press yet.

(What, Marie? No angst in this post? No no, there's plenty of angst left. Don't worry. I'm just not feeling very articulate about it just now.)

Termination dust on the top of the highest mountain in the Chugach range, which looks like it is only a stone's throw from the picture windows that front my parents' house. Summer is over. The snow will climb slowly down the mountains, and given the amount of precipitation Alaska has endured all year so far, it will do so hastily as the temperature drops away. I feel like there's an engine spooling up inside of me, ready to propel me hard into combat. Winter has always been a bad time for me, whether or not I was here or there. It's not SAD - I'm unaffected by the change in light - it's something deeper and more elemental than that, a trough in the yo-yo of earthly energies that leaves me often gasping for breath. I suppose it is exactly what it is for most beasts of the earth. A time of hibernation and preparation; I'm just still learning how to balance the fact that my life doesn't stop for these months. There is so much to be done. I'm dallying while my computer makes it's way up here in the mail; but once it arrives, there's things I'm to teach myself, and the organized assessment of college options I must see to. Applications, essays, portfolios. Scrutiny, both at me and on my part. I doubt I will feel ready, there has not been a lot of that afforded me this year. The blows come fast and hard; most individual forces in my life are totally heedless of anything else that might be acting on me, or might not be backing me up. More so, I find, than usual. Later, I will be able to look at it like a good exercise of being fast on my feet, but at the moment...