(no subject)
Dec. 6th, 2015 09:24 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
crowsEverything on craigslist looks like a scam. Everything on monster or careerbuilder is either for very skilled labor (no, I don't know how to repair specific, or any, medical equipment, nor do I have a CDL), part time and/or temporary, or KMart and Target.
I'm never going to get out. I made the mistake of thinking there actually was a door open to me when in fact I had missed that opportunity months ago because of trying to do the right thing by someone who probably at the end of the day didn't notice and didn't give a shit and likely has a bad opinion of me now either way. Because I don't have anything of value to offer anyone, and the things I can give aren't the things that people want me around for. Everything else is out of order and I don't know how to fix it. People still think I'm early twenties because it's so obvious I'm completely floundering and the idea that I might actually be an adult age is laughable.
There is nothing I am doing right now that doesn't come down to inertia and numb muscle memory. So fucking pointless.
I'm never going to get out. I made the mistake of thinking there actually was a door open to me when in fact I had missed that opportunity months ago because of trying to do the right thing by someone who probably at the end of the day didn't notice and didn't give a shit and likely has a bad opinion of me now either way. Because I don't have anything of value to offer anyone, and the things I can give aren't the things that people want me around for. Everything else is out of order and I don't know how to fix it. People still think I'm early twenties because it's so obvious I'm completely floundering and the idea that I might actually be an adult age is laughable.
There is nothing I am doing right now that doesn't come down to inertia and numb muscle memory. So fucking pointless.